Dr. Larry Fleinhardt: You know that it's considered unsolvable?
Charlie Eppes: Well, certainly people who have failed to solve it might think that.
[on the subject of p vs. np]

Don Eppes: So what does all your behavioral science training tell you about a grown man who still lives with his mother?
Megan Reeves: Probably about the same as two brothers still mooching meals at their dad's house three nights a week.

Colby Granger: You assualted an agent with a deadly weapon.
Henry Korfelt: It was a Volkswagen.

Charlie Eppes: Hey, hey, don't get all Fleinhardt on me. It's just the Physics Department paper airplane contest.
Dr. Larry Fleinhardt: Fl-Fleinhart? Since when did my last name become a predicate adjective?
Charlie Eppes: Since your students started using it that way.

Charlie Eppes: [Larry has been waxing philosophical] Is that the kind of stuff you talk about with Megan at lunch?
Don Eppes: [Don and Dad are surprised; Larry looks at Charlie, who grins mischievously] Wait, ho-ho-hold on. You and Megan went out to lunch?
Alan Eppes: Oh, please tell me you ordered something other than white food.
Dr. Larry Fleinhardt: [trying to maintain some dignity] This was a meal shared by two inquisitive minds in an intellectual pursuit.
Charlie Eppes: [grinning bigger] Of course it was, like all your lunches with David. Oh, and with Colby.
Dr. Larry Fleinhardt: [matter-of-factly] A gamma ray burst will release more energy in ten seconds than the sun will emit in its entire ten-billion-year lifespan.
Don Eppes: I got it, what's the Hulk's real name?
Charlie Eppes: Um, Bruce Banner.
Don Eppes: That's right. I mean, didn't gamma rays turn him into the Hulk?
Dr. Larry Fleinhardt: [still matter-of-factly] They come from the furthest ends of the universe, and after 45 years, we're still uncertain of their origin.
[turns to leave]
Alan Eppes: And?
Dr. Larry Fleinhardt: [pointedly matter-of-fact] And we're closer to an answer on *that* than the three of you are ever going to get on *this*.
[smirks slightly, and closes the door behind him]
Charlie Eppes: Larry?
Don Eppes: And Megan.
Alan Eppes: Now there's an image.

Don Eppes: Hey, Dad. What are you doing here?
Alan: Well, I-I like coming whenever Charlie gives one of these math for dummies lectures. It’s the only time I actually understand what he’s talking about.

Don Eppes: Okay, guys, sorry, hate to win and run, but I gotta go.
Charlie Eppes: Don’t worry, I’ll take care of the old man while you’re gone.
Alan Eppes: Old man?
Charlie Eppes: I use it strictly as a term of endearment, Father.
Alan Eppes: Well you better prepare yourself, my little boy, because...this old man’s gonna kick your butt.
Charlie Eppes: Oh yeah? What, are you gonna cheat again?
Alan Eppes: I’m gonna get the Scrabble board.
Charlie Eppes: (looks worried) ‘Cause, uh, Scrabble’s missing a piece.


Charlie Eppes: It’s from someone who says she’s a fan of my work on low dimensional topology. And she’s a fan of my...hair.


Don Eppes: We got anything on him?
Megan Reeves: Other than the fact that even stalkers don’t take good pictures at the DMV?

Charlie Eppes: You want me to be honest with you?
Larry Fleinhardt: No, I don't. I want to remain a blithering idiot. Yes, of course I want your honesty.

Larry Fleinhardt: (about Charlie) To graduate Princeton at 16, I mean I thought I was good, but it took me to the more normal age of 19!

Amita Ramanujan: You know, they say there's nothing sexier than a man who knows how to cook.
Charlie Eppes: Oh, yeah? What do you say? Do you agree?
Amita Ramanujan: I don't know. I like guys who are good at math.

{Charlie has just thrown Edgerton's half-eaten muffin down on the ground in order to demonstrate something}
Edgerton: You shouldn't come between a man and his fiber.

Colby Granger: Krav Maga at the Y?
Megan Reeves: Hey, when you're going to arrest people who are a hundred pounds heavier than you aCre, you're going to have to learn some hobbies.

Alan Eppes: Larry, I'm going to give you the same advice I've given to all the geniuses I know.
Larry Fleinhardt: And that is?
Alan Eppes: Don't be an idiot.

Alan Eppes: Yeah, that's what I thought.
Larry Fleinhardt: You could live with me, but I don't live anywhere.

Charlie Eppes: Larry, something went wrong, and I don't know what, and now it's like I can't even think.
Dr. Larry Fleinhardt: Well, let me guess: you tried to solve a problem involving human behavior, and it blew up in your face.
Charlie Eppes: Yeah, pretty much.
Dr. Larry Fleinhardt: Okay, well, Charles, you are a mathematician, you're always looking for the elegant solution. Human behavior is rarely, if ever, elegant. The universe is full of these odd bumps and twists. You know, perhaps you need to make your equation less elegant, more complicated; less precise, more descriptive. It's not going to be as pretty, but it might work a little bit better. Charlie, when you're working on human problems, there's going to be pain and disappointment. You gotta ask yourself, is it worth it?

Don Eppes: So, about your dream?
Charlie Eppes: Dad got shot. It was during a holdup, at the deli. It was... pretty upsetting.
Don Eppes: Yeah, I'm sure...
Charlie Eppes: And... mom made pancakes.
Don Eppes: [pauses] Pancakes?
Charlie Eppes: [shrugs] I don't even dream normal...

Charlie Eppes: Aunt Irene hates you.
Alan Eppes: She doesn't hate me. She was just a little disappointed at your mother's choice of spouse.

Larry Fleinhardt: Yup, curiousity. Bad for cats but great for scientists.

Alan Eppes: (Amita has just left to see off her parents, who say they like Charlie a lot) You do realize you have to marry her now, don't you?
Charlie Eppes: I think I'll have one of those cookies now.

Larry Fleinhardt: Well, I'm not one to interpret the innermost workings of the female psyche, but...girlfriend?

Security Guard: Excuse me, what're you doing?
Charlie Eppes: Simple experiment. It's a pendulum.
Security Guard: Sir, you and the pendulum need to leave.
Charlie Eppes: Okay. It drew an ellipse.

Alan Eppes: This is a heck of a big elephant in a relatively small yard.
Yes, that is censored. Conservative and proud of it!

Charlie Eppes: (to Amita) Is it wrong for me to get turned on at the sight of you in goggles and rubber gloves?

Amita Ramanujan: Maybe you accidentally cut somebody off in traffic. I mean, your driving is questionable.
Charlie Eppes: There’s nothing wrong with my driving.
Larry Fleinhardt: So the chorus of car horns that follows in your wake…(he and Amita chuckle)…What is that, a spontaneous phenomenon?

[Charlie grabs an ice cube out of Megan's drink for a demonstration]
Megan Reeves: Yes, I was done with that.